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Itchy, itchy feet... And fingers...

So, I arrived back from Seoul, South Korea on Sunday.

I am excited to begin my final year of my degree at Keele Uni in September (though I am slightly dreadful of the amount of reading and work that will be asked of me!). I am looking forward to seeing my boyfriend for the first time since before I left for Korea this weekend. I am excited to celebrate my Mom's 50th birthday in a few weeks time.

At the moment, I am in this weird state of mind, where I wanna get up, get out and do things - But I find myself stricken with such a potent case of sluggishness that nothing is happening at all, and I find myself watching daytime TV and finding even video games too taxing.


I think it may be because I was always doing something in Seoul - whether it be walking to the local market, or doing tourist-y sightseeing, I was always busy. And now that I'm back, I'm trying to recuperate from doing way more exercise than I ever have in my entire life and doing way more things generally than I am accustomed to, while also wanting to do stuff.

I guess I shouldn't rule out jetlag just yet - Though my sleeping pattern has all but normalised, travelling is a tiring thing to do. And it was literally a 24 hour ordeal. Plus the time difference of eight hours. Etc.

I dunno. I suddenly feel the urge to write - But most of my recent ideas seem to have come out too awkward as I begin them, or I cannot write the middle part when the beginning and end are complete, or something like, assignments, come up and I can't give the time I need to work my way through these problems. And I miss writing, I really do - That's why I took the Creative Writing module last semester, in the hopes it would help me realise I could fit in this sort've thing outside of work. It didn't. It was very fun, but also very stressful - Because writing something interesting and entertaining is not something you can do in one night, like how some choose to write their regular essays. It didn't help that I was faced with the problem of massive block, and creating my own interesting characters.

I always wanted to be an author, ever since I was three or four. Even when I was in College, I thought of teaching as a side job I would only do until I 'hit the big time' with an international best-seller. It sounds silly looking back - especially as I am now considering my options, whether to go back to Korea and teach there for a while, or whether to focus on my Philosophy and how to become a teacher in a subject area that is still up and coming... Just last night I was researching how to overcome anxiety issues surrounding teaching, how to prepare yourself for the process of teacher's training...

And yet I still feel this urge within me to write. The people in the Creative Writing class 'dissed' fanfiction. I found myself wanting to defend it, but didn't want to be labelled the way they were labelling the practice itself, bringing up the notoriously bad fanfiction (Tara Gillesbie's 'My Immortal' was mentioned more than once) and nothing else. I dunno, you can get some awesome stories out there.

I've gone off on a tangent. I suppose I like writing about myself as much as I enjoy writing about mansex...


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 2nd, 2011 10:30 pm (UTC)
Meh, fanfic has and will always have a bad rap, no matter how talented the writing. It's just one of those things that are low on the totem pole of geek hierarchy because it's new and threatening. Play an mmorpg for an hour every day? You're addicted and you have a problem (and you're probably anti-social, too), but if your mom spends the entire evening watching soap operas every day, she's fine.

Like I said, they just feel the need to validate themselves, y'know? Fanfic is the new kid on the block and the original writers have to mark their territory and assert their superiority. (Because writing a soppy romance story completely identical to the 2735725469274 out there is great and unique and whatever, but writing a new character interpretation of an established character who isn't yours is just silly and lazy and uninspired.) It's just the way of things. When the new Trek movie came out cuple of years ago, the fanziners from the 60's were out en masse bashing and pissing against lamp posts. Or when the first Pirates of the Caribbean came out, a particular demographic was shitting themselves because they were too busy pointing out they'd liked Johnny Depp before Captain Sparrow thankyouverymuch.

I may have given all this just a bit too much thought. I'm also vastly amused by how much more fanficcers become published in established extended canons (Star Wars, Star Trek, Dragonlance, Forgotten Realms, Devil May Cry, Warcraft etc.) than your original writers, the "real writers" who're lucky to get a novel into a crapsack anthology.

So yeah, fuck 'em. Do what makes you happy. (Also, I love your writing, be it original or fic.)
Aug. 3rd, 2011 07:31 pm (UTC)
My Mom is that kind of person! Does nothing but watch soaps in the evening. But yeah, it's weird... There's some damn good pieces out there that need more love, and they just get shoved aside or mocked because of the title, 'fanfic.' I hate it when good stuff is disregarded just because of the medium! It's the same, I think, with video games. Many people think that they're just for little kids when actually they deal with a lot of adult themes that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with the recommended playing age. The new Pokemon game, for instance, deals with some pretty 'grown up' issues, but because it's a VIDEO GAME and its POKEMON it must be for KIDS and GROWN UPS seen playing it are obviously WEIRD. It's a lot deeper than people give it credit for, and I wish people would appreciate that...
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )